Yap Away: How To Keep a Conversation Going Online

Discover actionable tips to keep conversations engaging and flowing when meeting new people online. Perfect for making meaningful connections.

So, you've made a new digital connection, shared some laughs and even learned their dog's name (shout out to Blitz). Now the real fun begins — learning how to keep the conversation going!

These days, the yapping energy online is real. You know that nonstop chatter with your BFF where you jump from memes to deep talks without missing a beat? It's all about staying in sync, bringing the banter and keeping the connection alive.

Conversational flow is both science and art. Maybe you can already bring main character energy to the table for 48 hours straight — and if you can, kudos! But if your yap game is still a work in progress, there are real tactics and proven approaches to level it up and strengthen virtual friendships. The rest comes down to practicing and polishing in your favorite digital space. So let's dive in: How do you keep a conversation going online?

Tools To Support Conversation Flow

The term ‘conversation’ comes from the Latin word ‘conversari,’ which means to keep company, or be familiar with someone. And what's the best way to gain familiarity? Dishing the deets in an engaging dialogue!

‘Dialogue’ actually comes from the Greeks, meaning through words. Together, they lead us to the cultural and (almost) etymological roots of the 21st-century yap: becoming familiar through words.

While a lot has changed in the outside world since the Latins and the Greeks were parties to yapping, very little has changed in the mechanics of interpersonal conversation. So, let's break down the tools of the trade and show how they work in online chats.

1. Active Listening

We get it. The urge to spill the tea is strong. But the real deal-maker in any conversation is listening — actively. This means staying fully present and paying attention to show you’re genuinely interested in what you're hearing. Here are a few tips to get you started:

Take affirmative action: Whether nodding your head in a video chat or sending little text reactions, show that you’re engaged in what your friend says. This keeps the discussion moving forward and makes the other person feel heard and appreciated.

Paraphrase main points: Repeat what you've heard and understood to demonstrate you're tuned in. For example, “So, you’re saying that trip to Japan was the best experience ever? What did you love most about it?” This technique guides the convo deeper and invites thoughtful, personal responses.

Offer your full attention: Resist the urge to think about your next line while your chat partner is still talking. Granted, it's easier said than done. If you're struggling, try focusing entirely on their words and tone. You might hear some emotional undercurrents to ask about or come up with more relevant responses to keep the chat flowing naturally.

2. Sharing Genuine Interest

It’s easy to tell when someone’s feigning interest. On the other hand, genuine curiosity is contagious. If your chat buddy gets hyped about a topic, ask follow-up questions, share your thoughts and get excited with them. Hot tip: If you find the conversation topic mundane, try leaning into their energy rather than the subject itself. What got them into it? What do they love about it? What does this say about them?

You can show you care and explore new avenues by following up on stories or hobbies they’ve mentioned previously. And in the worst-case scenario, if you're really struggling to show interest, challenge yourself to move out of your comfort zone and learn a new perspective. This welcomes opportunities to hunt for (and find) common ground.

3. Finding Common Ground

Landing on that sweet spot of commonality is like hitting gold in a conversation. It could be a mutual love for Stranger Things, a shared hatred for slow Wi-Fi or even an obsession with niche memes; common ground always makes for an interesting conversation.

The trick is to listen carefully and remember the topics that bring a noticeable spark. If your chat partner laughed a little harder when showing you their favorite cat videos or lit up when talking about their most recent travel adventures, that's your pathway forward. Venture into those inspiring topics and before you know it, you'll be yapping away about the things that animate you both. The key to finding common ground is asking questions — and a lot of them.

4. Asking Follow-Up Questions

Conversations are like onions, in that you have to peel back layers to get to the good stuff. Follow-up questions have a way of digging beneath the surface, transforming small talk into a more meaningful, longer conversation. It can be easy to auto-respond with a short answer when you hear something in passing, but you could also be brushing over wormholes to a new dimension of connection and chats.

Choose something to be curious about. Pick anything from the specific words selected to a detail of the story or even their perspective. Your curiosity will do two things: show the other person that you’re genuinely interested and create momentum to keep the conversation going. A solid follow-up question can take you from one-word answers to full-blown storytelling mode. This is where the flow begins.

5. Embracing Open-Ended Questions

There are ultimately two types of questions, regardless of whether you're asking in follow-up or otherwise: open-ended questions and closed questions. If a suitable response would be yes, no or another one-worded wonder, it's a closed query. If, on the other hand, the answer could lead anywhere from pygmy zebras to a play-by-play of an experience buying brioche last Tuesday morning, chances are you asked an open-ended question.

These are the inquests that start with what, how or why. Open questions encourage your digital pal to reflect and often bring discussions way beyond surface-level chatting. You’ll also find they carve space to explore unexpected directions in a boundless, fruitful conversation.

How To Apply Your Conversational Skills

Now that we’ve got the tools down, let’s talk game plan. Having good conversation skills with no strategy is like having tires and gas, but no car. In both cases, separate parts need to work together to get moving. Here, we'll explore how to create synergy and keep the conversation going.

Balancing the Conversation

Remember dialogue? Well, the reason dialogue makes a better conversation than its sibling monologue is because the former involves two people, whereas the latter only involves one. Good conversations are a two-way street, so aim for balance.

The key lies in sharing your stories and perspectives without dominating the chat. It’s all about the give and take. If you find yourself talking a lot, try pausing and asking for your conversation partner's insights, perspectives or any fun stories they have to share from the week. Aim for a natural rhythm where you contribute equally and your voices feel heard.

Staying Positive and Encouraging

Positivity is contagious, and when you bring good vibes to a conversation, it helps the other person feel relaxed and open. Maintaining a light, upbeat energy can help turn things around even when the vibes become tense. You can encourage your chat partner to share more by offering little nudges of positivity. Compliment their stories, relate to their experiences and make an effort to see them through a positive light. And if things get awkward or uncomfortable? That’s cool, too. Just breathe, smile and steer the conversation into more lighthearted territory. Speaking of which…

Handling Awkward Moments

The dreaded awkward silence. It’s a moment we all know too well. But here’s a hot take: An awkward pause doesn’t have to derail your convo. Instead, see the moment as an opportunity to shift the discussion in a new direction. When the silence hits, use it as a chance to approach a different topic or follow up on an earlier train of thought. This helps you steer the conversation out of Strangeville and into something fresh and engaging.

Body Language and Non-Verbal Cues

Body language impacts our understanding of a message, and in turn, conversational flow. Even in an online setting, non-verbal cues can make or break a conversation. During video chats, your body language speaks volumes. Check in with your physical self throughout the chat to make sure you're not only feeling comfortable but expressing it. Here are some elements to look out for:

Posture: Keeping a straight back, relaxing your shoulders and facing toward the camera all exude confidence — even when you're not feeling it — and send a positive message to the other person.

Facial expressions: Animate your facial expressions to reflect what you're hearing, whether it's a hilarious story or a cringe moment from the deepest, darkest years of high school.

Eye contact: Maintaining eye contact (or, in a digital setting, looking straight into the camera), creates a sense of connection between you and your digital friend.

Body movement: Your body is an extension of your storytelling. Moving closer to the camera, leaning back and speaking with your hands add a dynamic and captivating layer to your communication.

Voice: Your vocal tone can give away secrets that your words don't. Mix up your pace, use higher or lower pitch and add in the odd pause to make your message more magnetic.

Gestures: Nodding and smiling are small gestures that show your conversation partner that you’re engaged and actively listening.

Embrace Long, Flowing Conversations on Higo

Short, light conversations can be a fun way to break up the day. But more connected and dialogue-driven yaps bear much sweeter fruits in your social circles and well-being. The positive effects of building digital relationships are clear. Plus, the more you practice your conversation skills, the better you get at them. And what better place to take them for a spin than on video chat app platforms like Higo?

Whether meeting new people or strengthening existing friendships, putting these conversation strategies into action can level up your one-to-one video chat game.

Start chatting now!